Several churches all across America are asking the same question these days and it usually goes something like this, "Where are all the Younger Adults?"
W. Bradford Wilcox has written an interesting piece in The Wall Street Journal stating the expansion of government and the increasing delay of marriage among young people are two important reasons for the increasing secularization of America. Citing recent statistics which state that only 25% of Americans 21 to 45 attend church, down from one-third in 1970s, Wilcox quotes Princeton sociologist Robert Wuthnow:
The most powerful force driving religious participation down is the nation's recent retreat from marriage, Mr. Wuthnow notes. Nothing brings women and especially men into the pews like marriage and parenthood, as they seek out the religious, moral and social support provided by a congregation upon starting a family of their own. But because growing numbers of young adults are now postponing or avoiding marriage and childbearing, they are also much less likely to end up in church on any given Sunday. Mr. Wuthnow estimates that America's houses of worship would have about six million more regularly attending young adults if today's young men and women started families at the rate they did three decades ago.
I'm not saying I agree 100% with this assessment but I think its worth some dialogue. I've heard numerous people say something like this... "Teenagers drop out of the church at about 80% upon graduation only to return when they become parents themselves and want their kids to experience church like they did..." Well the question must be asked is... If people are getting married at a much later age (some estimate 28-29 as the average) then would it not make sense that they did not show back up in church until their mid 30s?
I'd love to hear your thoughts?
- Do you think people waiting longer to get married is a bad/negative thing for the church?
- What correlation (if any) do you think getting married later in life has to do with a decline of the Young Age Group in the church today?
source: S Patton
6 comments:
I have to say that I have thought of this before but only from my small perspective. Like where are all the young ladies at the bible studies at our church? I am easily the youngest with the exception of a couple here or there. And I posed this question to a mentor of mine who lives in a much bigger city and she said that there are tons of "girls" my age at their bible studies so I just figured it was the demographics of our church.
Here is another question (questions) from your question:
Where are the young ladies? Are we too busy with our families to participate in 1.5 hours of organized bible study every week with other ladies? Do we feel the church has nothing to offer us? Are we only able to serve in the areas of small children? Do we value the mentorship of the ladies who are in different seasons? Are we forgetting to put ourselves on the "to do" list?
I don't have those answers. But I venture to guess on those you proposed, again from my small perspective.
I would lump it all in saying anytime people are not in church or more accurately, being the church that has a negative impact. It would seem that everyone wants their kids to grow up in the church but "no one" wants to "stay in" the church. Or maybe there is a thought that "I really dont need church but my kids will." Or are we looking for the church to "raise" our kids???
HMMMM. More questions that answers...haven't helped at all have I.
Great points Shelly, since you asked me I'll give you my 2 cents as to why there are few younger women in the ladies Bible study.
The younger ladies of our church (I would actually say 70-80% of them) are already involved in numerous ministries. I know several of these young moms who are teaching kids on Sunday morning, helping out with kids on Wednesday nights, coming up to the church Sunday afternoons and leading special groups of kids in music, drama, etc. For them to commit to yet another bible study that requires probably the only 2 hours of their week which is not already allocated MAY be a bit much.
If you ask me they are simply worn out and tired.
Now this Sunday afternoon in your class look around and who will you see in there? My guess is that you'll see several ladies (the majority) who attend church on Sundays, maybe Wednesday night, maybe an occasional Thursday Bible study. However 70-80% of them are not serving on a consistent basis in an ongoing ministry. Bottom line = they have the time. Their kids are gone and their weeks are much less stressed. I'm not saying that all of you in the lesson are NOT involved in other ministries. Please don't hear that. But what I am saying is that I would argue the majority of the ladies in there are not serving "as much" as the younger women whom are being sought out.
This kind of thing happens in a church like ours. It's a good-sized church in a small-sized town. Typically you have a minority of the people doing the majority of the work. After a while you just begin to draw from the same pool of resources and eventually stretch many people too thin.
I think the real question we ought to be asking is not "Where are all the young ladies in the ladies bible study?" But rather, how can we as a church alleviate some of the pressure, anxiety, stress, and busyness of these younger women who are actually shining examples of service and ministry. I think the older ladies should help that younger mom during the week so that maybe she'll have a few hours to devote to a bible study.
There, that's my tidbit. However, I'm not a woman so I could just be airing ignorance and stupidity here.
I agree Robert on so many levels. There are times when our Sunday School class is almost bare due to others serving. Makes me proud!
And here, here on the "worn out and tired"! I think you're right on that too. It is hard to add one more thing on a plate. Gotta pick and choose.
And you do see the same folks serving time and time again....thinkin there is a verse on that too. Something along the lines of the work is plentiful but the workers are few. Seems to be the same in most things. Like sports--everyone wants their kids to play but no one wants to coach, people want their kids to go to vbs but no one wants to help, people want their kids to go to summer camp but no one wants to chaperone, everyone wants to complain about the president but not everyone voted.
Sigh.
Hey Shelly! Great comment and question. I can just tell you why I do not attend the Ladies Bible Study. I have done a few Beth Moore Bible study's. I have found they take a lot of time (for me a least an hour a day, if not more) to study for. With that said I don't have that amount of time to study during the week. Right know I am teaching the four yr. olds every other week, then the high school every other week. I help out on Wednesday night with the youth service and Sunday nights @ 6:00 we have small groups at our house. Also the Bible studies are soooo long. The one right know is 13 weeks long. That's a long time. I am worn out and to think of studying for another lesson makes stress out. I have been asked this question many times. So I started thinking about the young moms in our church (you included) are involved in MANY ministries in our church. Yes there are some older women who help out, but if we did not teach and volunteer with the children's and pre-school department those ministries would fall apart. With all that said it's not that maybe they don't want to come, it's because there required in so many other places they can't. I don't know if this helps, but it's a great question. You're an amazing mom!!!
I hear you Shelly. And agree with you too. Beth Moore is amazing but can be a kick in the pants too due to the depth and length of the studies. I always learn so much but feel like Ive been hit by a truck after.
Good comments from you too...seems I have lead us away from your original quandry, Robert. Oops! And apparently we three are the only ones interested too! HA!
But to throw out another suggestion for your "younger adults" question: maybe young adults don't feel the need for church until they have kids and are married OR maybe it is that marriage and parenting are designed to be so self-sacrificing that if you don't get yourself in the church you are liable to kill someone...just brainstorming.
You said it Shelly!
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